We explore Día de los Muertos as a ritual that nurtures community, imbues loss with meaning, and helps us process grief while also connecting through shared joy.
Summary: We investigate how Día de los Muertos, or Day of the Dead, rituals strengthen family ties and cultural identity, and learn about its evolution from a 3,000 year old practice to a global celebration. We look at key elements like the ofrenda and explore how commercialization—like Mattel’s Day of the Dead Barbie—raises questions about balancing tradition with modern influences.
Scroll down for transcript.
Guest: Michelle Telléz is an Associate Professor in Mexican-American studies at Arizona State University.
Learn more about Michelle: https://tinyurl.com/2ph3can7
Guest: Mathew Sandoval, a.ka. "Dr. Muerte," an artist and Associate Professor at Arizona State University. He is a leading expert on Día de los Muertos.
Learn more about Mathew: mathewsandoval.com
Transcript:
MICHELLE TÉLLEZ: For me, Día de los Muertos wasn't something I necessarily grew up with. Thirty, forty years ago, when my mother migrated from our small town, Tomatlán, Jalisco, to Southern California, she didn't bring some of the traditions from the Pueblo. So, we didn’t grow up with Día de los Muertos. In this culture in the U.S., we don’t talk about grief. We don’t talk about death. There’s a lot of fear attached to it.
But when my father passed away suddenly when I was 20 years old, I realized I needed to find a way to stay connected to his memory. I think, in this culture in the U.S., right, we don’t talk about grief. We don’t talk about death. There’s fear attached to it. So I learned about the tradition through community members and started learning how to build an altar, what all the pieces of the altar signified. I was really trying to be thoughtful about it.
For me, it’s a reminder to balance mourning and grief with celebration, and continuously processing it every year.
DACHER KELTNER: Hey everyone, I’m Dacher Keltner. This week on The Science of Happiness, we’re exploring Día de los Muertos, a 3,000-year-old tradition that honors those we’ve lost and brings communities together through rituals that help us process grief and joy.
I’m joined by Dr. Michelle Téllez, a scholar of Mexican American studies at the University of Arizona, whose family hails from Jalisco, Mexico—the same place I was born.
She shares how the tradition reconnected her with her cultural roots while strengthening bonds with her family and community.
We also hear about the power of rituals from Dr. Mathew Sandoval, aka Dr. Muerte.
MATHEW SANDOVAL: The cultural roots of Día de los Muertos are anchored in ancient Native American traditions in Latin America. But there are also roots that come from European Catholicism, European paganism, North African Islamic culture, and West African animist traditions. So, I tend to think of Día de los Muertos as a global phenomenon that’s becoming even more global in the 21st century.
DACHER KELTNER: More about Día de los Muertos after this break.
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DACHER KELTNER: Welcome back to The Science of Happiness. I’m Dacher Keltner. We’re joined by Dr. Michelle Téllez, who will share how Día de los Muertos creates space for healing by holding both joy and sorrow through communal ritual—and how these rituals can shape our understanding of identity, loss, and life. Michelle, thanks for joining us.
MICHELLE TÉLLEZ: It's a pleasure to be here.
DACHER KELTNER: In our lab here at Berkeley, we’ve studied collective experiences, what we call collective effervescence, and rituals around the end of life. We know that rituals are important. Can you tell us about your personal relationship to Día de los Muertos?
MICHELLE TÉLLEZ: It’s almost like the preparations for the ceremony allow you to re-invite all these people you love back into your life. For me, Día de los Muertos isn’t just about the actual day—it’s about the preparation, the creative outlet, the celebration, the memories. One thing my daughter and I like to do is remember the foods that people liked, and we’ll start adding those to the altar.
It’s a continual sense of spiritual and evolutionary growth. Every year, the ritual brings something new.
DACHER KELTNER: I would love for you to walk us through the basic elements of the ritual, and explain what an ofrenda is.
MICHELLE TÉLLEZ: An ofrenda is an offering—it’s what you put out materially into the spiritual world as a way to connect yourself to this other realm. The central elements include photos or names of those who’ve passed, and the four elements: earth, wind, fire, and water. We use papel picado for wind, candles for fire, and incense—copal is traditional in Mexico. We also bring their favorite foods to the altar. Typically, I make tortilla soup. I invite family and friends over, and whatever we’re eating, we also offer it to the altar, recognizing that we’re sharing this moment together.
It’s a way for my family and community to see the larger community we are part of. You want your intentions in the ofrenda, so it doesn’t have to be something specific—it’s about how you think about it as you place it on the altar.
DACHER KELTNER: The Western European view of death is all anxiety and loss. We forget how love persists. I remember the ways I ritualized my brother’s passing—visiting trees that reminded me of him, going to places we went to in the mountains. It brought back his generosity and love. How has this ritual added meaning to your grief over your father and mother?
MICHELLE TÉLLEZ: Grief is a universal experience. Finding ways to cope and be in community after losing a loved one is so important. Grief lives in our bodies, and we don’t always have a place to put it. This ritual isn’t just about grief, though—it’s about celebrating a life, honoring them, welcoming them. But I can’t ignore that grief is central to loss.
In a society where we’re not allowed to face death directly, this ritual allows my family to have conversations about grief and mortality without seeing them as an end. My daughter has a connection to my father, despite never meeting him, because we honor him in this way. It’s a way of remembering that we don’t cease to exist because we’re shaped by those who came before us.
Instead of running from grief, we bring them to life through this practice, and it’s a collective practice that connects us. That’s really powerful.
DACHER KELTNER: Profound.
You’ve spoken about the collective feeling you get from this ritual. Can you describe a specific moment where you felt that higher sense of connection?
MICHELLE TÉLLEZ: I live in Arizona, and I was three months pregnant when I moved here, alone. I didn’t know anyone and didn’t have a sense of community. My daughter was born in February, and later that year, I decided to invite the community members I’d met to bring something for the altar I was building. That was the start of this tradition. I invited colleagues, some of whom didn’t know about the tradition, and we gathered around the altar. Everyone brought photos, flowers, or candles. We formed a circle, shared food, and spoke about memories of loved ones. Everyone came from different spiritual backgrounds, but there was vulnerability in that shared experience. It was beautiful. That commonality brings us together in community.
DACHER KELTNER: You’ve talked about how this shaped your daughter’s sense of identity and culture. How did participating in the ritual impact her?
MICHELLE TÉLLEZ: My daughter, from a young age, recognized that we did things a little differently, and she resisted that at first. She wanted to be like her friends, go to the mall, do things differently. But as she’s grown older—she’s 18 now and a first-year college student—she’s come to appreciate our “beautiful, wacky, ancestrally guided life.”
Now, she’s in a phase of questioning, exploring different philosophies and cosmologies, and that’s fantastic. She’s realizing the significance of the ritual and how it connects her to her grandparents, even though she never met them. A week ago, she said she was sad she wouldn’t be home for Día de los Muertos this year, but I told her, “Now it’s your turn to start that ritual in the place you are. And that’s okay.”
DACHER KELTNER: You’ve given her a platform to think about these big questions about spirit and life.
Michelle Téllez, thank you so much for this interview. You’ve made us think more broadly about grief and joy and how rituals help us grapple with these universal tendencies. Thanks for being on the show.
MICHELLE TÉLLEZ: It was wonderful to be here.
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DACHER KELTNER: Up next, Dr. Mathew Sandoval—aka Dr. Muerte—shares his knowledge on the deep history of Día de los Muertos and its cultural significance today across the world.
MATHEW SANDOVAL: It’s really about honoring one’s ancestors—not just the recently deceased, but those who’ve existed only as ghostly traces in our DNA.
DACHER KELTNER: We’ll be back with more in just a moment.
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DACHER KELTNER: Welcome back to The Science of Happiness. I’m Dacher Keltner, and we’re exploring how rituals like Día de los Muertos help us navigate grief, build community, and honor loved ones. Joining us is Dr. Mathew Sandoval, a leading expert on Día de los Muertos. Mathew, thanks so much for joining us.
MATHEW SANDOVAL: It’s absolutely my pleasure. Thank you for having me.
DACHER KELTNER: I'm fascinated by how cultural rituals evolve. Día de los Muertos began as an ancient ritual, but now it's celebrated globally in so many different ways. How do you think about this cultural evolution?
MATHEW SANDOVAL: The roots of Día de los Muertos are ancient, deeply tied to Mesoamerican traditions. But they’ve also been influenced by European Catholicism, paganism, North African Islamic culture, and West African animist traditions, all blending during Mexico's colonial period in the 1500s to 1700s. So, I think of Día de los Muertos as a global phenomenon, and it’s only becoming more global in the 21st century.
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MATHEW SANDOVAL: At its heart, Día de los Muertos is about honoring one’s ancestors—not just the recently deceased, but those who are distant in time, who exist only as ghostly traces in our DNA. It’s about honoring them too.
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MATHEW SANDOVAL: One reason it’s becoming so popular, especially in the U.S., is the growing interest in ancestry. You know, things like ancestry.com, the search for one’s roots—it’s all becoming connected to Día de los Muertos in a very profound way.
[Pause]
DACHER KELTNER: That’s fascinating. I know you’ve written about this and explored it in your upcoming documentary. The global explosion of interest in Día de los Muertos—there’s even a Día de los Muertos Barbie. How do you view this rise in popularity?
MATHEW SANDOVAL: If I’m being honest, I’m of two minds. On one hand, the global popularity has led to crass commercialization and cultural appropriation, which can be harmful. On the other hand, I’ve seen people who aren’t Latino or Mexican, who’ve embraced Día de los Muertos in a meaningful way. It serves a real purpose for them because I see it as medicinal.
But yes, the tradition is transforming. Take Disney’s Coco—over a billion people have seen it. In Mexico, watching Cocoon Día de los Muertos has become a new tradition. Another example is the Great Parade in Mexico City, inspired by the James Bond movie Spectre in 2016. It was a cinematic invention, but now it’s a real annual event that draws over 2 million people.
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MATHEW SANDOVAL: I’ve been critical of Día de los Muertos turning into this large spectacle. But maybe there’s value in this scale—millions of people engaging in a shared experience, dressed as calacas, painted like sugar skulls. That collective awe around death might be transformative, a way for people to deeply connect with the reality of death in a powerful way.
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DACHER KELTNER: How does practicing Día de los Muertos, especially with others, impact people socially?
MATHEW SANDOVAL: Based on my interviews, one of the fundamental reasons people come out to celebrate is that sense of connection—to carry collective grief together. Grief is heavy and isolating, but Día de los Muertos, by being a communal celebration, allows that burden to be shared. And when grief is shared, it transforms. That’s why these celebrations are filled with so much joy. It’s healing to unburden grief, even if just for a day or a few hours, through community connection.
[Pause]
MATHEW SANDOVAL: If Día de los Muertos didn’t offer that medicine, it wouldn’t have survived. Its staying power comes from the way it helps people heal, making them feel less alone, more connected to a larger sense of community—and, really, to humanity.
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DACHER KELTNER: A lot of your work examines how rituals guide us through key life stages, like coming of age or facing the end of life. How do you think the rituals of Día de los Muertos help children cope with loss?
MATHEW SANDOVAL: I have a 14-month-old daughter, and I’ll be sharing this tradition with her. As I teach her, I’m preparing myself to be an ancestor, someone remembered on an altar. And I’m also preparing her to handle my death when it comes. I want her to associate it not with finality, but with eternal remembrance. Hopefully, by giving her these tools, it will make the transition easier when that time comes.
[Slight pause]
DACHER KELTNER: It’s so true—we don’t talk about the end of life with children. What do you think this practice gives them?
MATHEW SANDOVAL: It gives them an understanding of death that isn’t grounded in fear. I want my daughter to deal squarely with death, to see it not as an end but as part of a life process—a meaningful component of life.
[Music fades in]
MATHEW SANDOVAL: I think that understanding helps children, and everyone really, to approach life with less fear and more perspective. They realize everything and everyone is impermanent, and that’s okay. It’s a deep acknowledgment that can only help future generations.
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DACHER KELTNER: And there’s new research showing that embracing this cyclical view of life can help people handle stress and find deeper meaning in their lives.
DACHER KELTNER: Mathew Sandoval, thank you so much for sharing your insights and helping us appreciate this profound cultural tradition.
MATHEW SANDOVAL: Absolutely. My pleasure.
DACHER KELTNER: Thanks for joining us on The Science of Happiness. Our producer is Dasha Zerboni. Our research assistant is Selina Bilal. Sound design is by Jennie Cataldo from Accompany Studios. Shuka Kalantari is our executive producer. I’m Dacher Keltner. Have a great day.
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