How Schools and Families Can Honor Students’ Identities

For too long, many children have experienced barriers that harm their sense of safety, belonging, value, competence, and confidence to speak up on behalf of themselves and others. Examples include children who are teased about their race, gender identity, the languages they speak, and being neurodiverse. These negative characterizations from peers, educators, and media have become so prevalent that we might not know what to do to wholly support such children.  

Can this be changed? Yes! 

In our book, Identity Safe Spaces at Home and School: Partnering to Overcome Inequity, we describe how families and educators can partner to support children in recognizing and believing in their strengths and assets and building a positive sense of self. The insights we share include research on identity safety and courageous contributions from 29 youth, caregivers, and educators—and can help you take steps toward that goal in your school or community today.

Partnering for safety and belonging

When we talk about affirming students’ identities and cultivating identity safety, we are referring to identities like race, gender, age, and appearance, as well as sexual orientation, social class, nationality, ethnicity, and religion. Research by social psychologist Claude Steele and educator Dorothy Steele found that when a child’s identity is undermined, their confidence erodes and it hurts their performance. For example, this might happen due to bullying, harassment, exclusion, or negative stereotyping.

Most importantly, they found that when a child’s unique identity is validated and valued, they feel a sense of belonging and do better in school.

This kind of focus on identity safety complements “strengths-based” practices that draw from students’ strengths and assets rather than focusing on their deficits or limitations. For example, University of Arizona researchers highlight the “funds of knowledge” and expertise that all families and communities possess. They explain how these provide children with a wealth of knowledge and skills and support a positive sense of self. Indeed, research suggests that a strengths-based approach has tremendous potential for overcoming inequities.

While many schools are implementing identity-safe and strengths-based practices, we need to broaden this work to include families. The importance of family-school engagement is well-documented. It is especially important for children and families who face stigma based on race, ethnicity, language, sexual orientation, and neurodiversity, often compounded by adverse childhood experiences and significant educational disruptions. School-family partnerships can help us overcome inequities, equalize status, and amplify the voices that need to be heard.

Tools for building confidence in students

What does it look like to affirm children’s identities and positive qualities? Children need to hear many messages to shape a positive sense of their identity. We can do this by highlighting their strengths, honoring who they are as individuals, and making sure they have access to inspirational role models, especially ones who share their identities.

For example, Jesús Mena grew up in Texas near the Mexican border, where most families were migrant workers. He only had one Chicano teacher in 13 years of schooling—Mr. Perez, his chemistry teacher. Jesús explained, “I was scared about going to college. I chose to major in chemistry. Why? Because my only Chicano teacher was Mr. Pérez.”

That initial inspiration gave him the confidence and courage to attend and graduate from college. Jesús became a chemistry major and eventually a chemist. His experience demonstrates the inspiration that role models serve.

It’s also helpful to listen, express interest in, and be curious about children’s lives. For example, Menominee educator Paula Rabideaux recalls her daughter’s experience:

One day, a teacher said to my daughter, “I heard you have a Powwow on your reservation this weekend. Are you going?” My daughter looked at her, amazed; no one had ever asked about anything Indigenous. “Yeah, there is,” she replied. The teacher continued, “If you go, maybe you can tell me about it next week.” It made my daughter’s day, giving her an uplifting feeling that the teacher cared. From then on, my daughter loved this teacher and got an A in her course. To this day, she is her favorite teacher. With Native students, there is no secret to culturally responsive practices; the main ingredient is relationships.

Caregivers have tremendous power to support their children in a similar way. For example, college student Sameer Jha recalls the experience of telling his parents that he was gay:

My parents always promised they’d love me no matter what . . . they were 100% supportive. They clarified that anyone who didn’t support me wouldn’t be part of our life anymore. It was incredibly courageous of them and the right thing to do.

Identity safety flourishes in an environment that:

• enhances children’s capacities to build agency and caring, empathic relationships; and
• supports children in navigating adversity and emerging more resilient as they encounter life’s inevitable challenges.

When their identities are validated, children become more empowered to assert their worth and advocate for equity and fairness for themselves and others. This is especially true when they inevitably experience negative messaging. Lenore Harris recounts an experience when her son advocated for himself:

There were only two Black boys in his class. His teacher continuously used the other young man’s name. When my son, Emmanuel, complained to me about it, I suggested we talk to the teacher. However, he felt confident to speak with the teacher on his own behalf. After he spoke with her, he told me, “I didn’t lose my temper or raise my voice. I stayed calm and said, ‘You keep calling me by so-and-so’s name, and I don’t like it. My name is Emmanuel.’ And she said, ‘I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to do that.’ So, I told her, ‘I know you didn’t mean to do it. But you keep doing it. I think it’s racist because we are the only two Black kids in the class. You call everyone else by their name, but not me and him.’” He was able to advocate for himself in such an impressive manner, making me very proud of him.

Fostering home-school partnerships

While practices like these can be done at school or at home separately, home-school partnerships are important. They allow educators to learn about each student and their unique family background and allow caregivers to discover additional ways to support their children.

We can begin by creating a caring and welcoming climate for caregivers at school. There are many ways large and small for families to be involved with us. For example, we can invite them into the classroom for special activities and encourage them to share cultural traditions, knowledge, and expertise. We can also offer opportunities to volunteer and participate in decision making and school governance. Trust is built in every interaction between educators and families. Here are two effective practices.

Listening tours. Listening tours are sessions where caregivers can share ideas, concerns, and questions individually or in groups. The goal is to foster dialogue where educators gather information about what caregivers feel or think in general or about a specific topic (for example, the special education intake process or the multi-lingual learner program). When listening tours are done thoughtfully and without judgment, educators learn about their community and what is on the minds of families.

Louise Bay Waters, a former principal, shared the power of a listening tour she organized with Afghan families:

Through these initial listening tours and ongoing parent conversations, I discovered sadness among many immigrant parents. They were proud of their children’s growing English but alarmed at the loss of their native language. They worried that they could not support their children academically without the ability to communicate. However, their deepest fear was losing authority. How could they ensure their children respected the teacher? How could they protect them from drugs or gang activity if the children no longer respected them, their culture, or their language?

As a result of the listening tour, she instituted a Language Academy, offering primary language instruction in many languages. Many immigrant families participated.

Working groups. An identity-safety working group can support, analyze, and strengthen home-school partnerships by involving caregivers, educators, students, and community members. Some of its most important purposes are to affirm the many identities present in a school and support students’ academically and socially. A working group can also foster pride and cultural humility, help everyone counteract negative stereotypes, and involve families to celebrate the school’s rich diversity.  Additionally, it helps everyone learn and grow together and positively influence school policies, practices, and governance to be inclusive.

Tips for facilitating working groups:

• Become familiar with the community to develop trusting relationships.
• Co-create norms for working together and agendas with the communities’ needs in mind.
• Respect diverse opinions and invite all voices to participate.
• Set goals, monitor progress, and celebrate successes!

Working groups can embody the spirit of identity safety and empower a collaborative schoolwide identity-safety effort. We describe two successful examples in our book.
 
First, during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic in the Brockton District in Massachusetts, teams of bilingual-bicultural parent/guardian volunteers, paraprofessionals, counselors, and nurses staffed a multilingual call center, providing support and access to desperately needed medical, counseling, and food services for families, staff, and students, as it was one of the most COVID-19–impacted cities in the state.
 
Another example is the Wolfe Street Academy in Baltimore, Maryland. They work in close partnership with the University of Maryland School of Dentistry to respond to students’ dental needs. Interns from the University of Maryland’s Dental School receive invaluable experience and Wolfe Street Academy’s students and families are co-powered in supporting the school’s dental health and well-being.

We can create a caring and welcoming school environment by co-powering and co-partnering with families. We can do this by using a strengths-based approach that fully supports each child in feeling safe and having a sense of belonging, value, competence, and confidence to speak on behalf of themselves and others.

Together, we can dismantle inequities, foster empathy, and work to create spaces where everyone feels identity-safe—especially as we become a more richly diverse populace.