What makes a good leader? Many character traits come to mind, including confidence, adaptability, and decisiveness. Leaders also need certain skills, ones they can learn at school or train in on the job.
But a new study identifies another influence on good leadership that we might not always think about: leaders’ home life. Researchers Jasmine Hu, Daniel Kim, and Klodiana Lanaj found that feeling appreciated at home inspires leaders to help others at work, too. In other words, for leaders to effectively support their employees, someone needs to fill their own “cup,” as well.
“Little research has investigated leaders’ personal lives and how their home life may impact how they feel and act at work,” Lanaj says. “Therefore, we wanted to take a more comprehensive look at leaders and investigate how life at home impacted their perceptions and behaviors at work.”
The study consisted of three experiments with a total of 103 full-time managers from high schools, and 116 leader-follower pairs and 109 leaders from various industries, like manufacturing and health care. In each study, leaders recalled a time when they did something beneficial for their family and their family members showed appreciation, and then they wrote a few sentences about what happened and how it felt.
“These types of [activities] help them savor the experience again in ways that amplify positive feelings associated with the experience,” Lanaj says.
In each experiment, leaders completed online surveys at various times throughout the day to assess how much they felt they made a positive impact at home, as well as their “need fulfillment” (how much their basic psychological needs for a sense of autonomy, competence, and connection were satisfied). In two experiments, leaders also evaluated their helping and empowering behaviors at work—for example, how much they showed concern and courtesy toward employees, as well as allowed subordinates to be involved in important decisions. In one experiment, randomly selected employees provided their perspectives on their leaders’ helping and empowering behaviors.
All three experiments found that reflecting on gratitude received at home helped leaders see the positive impact they made in their family, which fulfilled their basic psychological needs. This, in turn, motivated leaders to be more helpful and empowering to their employees at work, compared to leaders who went through the same experiment but wrote about mundane things like their possessions or meals.
“What we show here is that being engaged with family at home is enriching for leaders at work,” says Lanaj.
So, what does this mean for leaders? Despite the many demands of our job when working in a leadership role, it is important to remain present and grateful when in the presence of our loved ones at home. Clearly, work life and home life aren’t as separate as sometimes believed; having a successful life at home in which leaders feel recharged and appreciated appears to have a direct impact on the way they are engaged with their work and coworkers.
What does this study mean for family members of leaders? No matter how powerful a person may be at work, the love and trust of family members is still very meaningful to them.
As we approach Thanksgiving, gratitude only becomes more important to keep in mind. Appreciating people around us isn’t just a momentary gesture but can have a lasting influence on their lives.
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