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Psychologist and stress expert Elissa Epel leads us in a gentle, science-backed practice to calm our nervous systems and meet uncertainty with greater ease and acceptance.
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How To Do This Practice:
- Settle in: Find a quiet, comfortable place to sit. Close your eyes or soften your gaze, and begin breathing in through your nose with long, slow exhales through pursed lips.
- Scan your body: Gently move your attention from the top of your head down to your toes, noticing areas of tension with a kind, curious awareness.
- Breathe into tension: Wherever you feel tightness, breathe into that area and soften it with each exhale, allowing your nervous system to relax just a little more.
- Notice uncertainty: Turn your attention to your thoughts and feelings. Ask yourself what feels uncertain right now, and name any emotions that arise without trying to change them.
- Ask yourself: What is on my mind right now? Am I thinking about the past, the future, or am I right here in the present?” What do I feel most uncertain about right now? What expectations might I be holding? Am I striving to control something? What feelings do I have right now?
- Release control: Notice where you may be holding expectations or trying to control the future, and gently practice letting go, reminding yourself that uncertainty is part of life.
- Rest in the present: Lean back, relax your shoulders, and focus on the safety and ease of this moment, repeating a phrase like “Things are exactly as they are right now.”
Today’s Happiness Break Guide:
ELISSA EPEL, PH.D, is a Professor and Vice Chair in the Department of Psychiatry & Behavioral Sciences, at University of California, San Francisco.
Learn more about Elissa Epel here: https://www.elissaepel.com/
Related Happiness Break episodes:
Loving Kindness Meditation: https://tinyurl.com/2kr4fjz5
Embodying Resilience: https://tinyurl.com/46383mhx
A Meditation for When You Feel Uneasy: https://tinyurl.com/4utrkyh5
Related Science of Happiness episodes:
Make Uncertainty Part of the Process: https://tinyurl.com/234u5ds7
How To Show Up For Yourself: https://tinyurl.com/56ktb9xc
How Holding Yourself Can Reduce Stress: https://tinyurl.com/2hvhkwe6
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Transcription:
DACHER KELTNER: Hi everyone, this is Dacher Keltner. Welcome to Happiness Break, where we share short, science-backed practices to help you find more peace and ease.
The human brain craves certainty, but so much of life is unpredictable. And we know how much that can drain our system.
It dampens our mood, increases both emotional stress and activation of the autonomic nervous system.
It’s necessary to stop, tune in and release the fear and tension.
So today, we’re bringing you a chance to pause and reset. UCSF psychologist Dr. Elissa Epel guides us through a brief practice designed to help us learn how to be with the unknown.
Here’s Elissa.
ELISSA EPEL: This practice is about learning how to sit with uncertainty. And the anxiety that often comes with it by noticing and accepting how it shows up in your body. So find a comfortable, quiet place to sit. And allow yourself to be guided by my suggestions.
First, tune into your body, get into a comfortable position, and close your eyes or soften your gaze. Take a few deep breaths in through your nose. With a long exhale through your mouth.
For about a minute, slowly scan your body with your attention like you're using a flashlight of attention, starting at the top of your head and gradually moving it down all the way to the tips of your toes. The beam of light is kind, warm and curious attention. Notice where you're holding tension or tightness as this beam scans down your body.
Gently breathe into any tight areas and release, breathe into them again and release again.
And when you're ready, you can ask yourself, “What is on my mind right now? Am I thinking about the past, the future, or am I right here in the present?”
What do I feel most uncertain about right now?
What expectations might I be holding?
Am I striving to control something?
What feelings do I have right now? with your hands on your heart Acknowledge any feelings that are present, allowing painful or uncomfortable feelings to arise and be named.
Welcome these visitors by name.
These feelings will come and go.
And now see if you can loosen or let go of an expectation or something you are trying to control. Notice any attachment about how you think things should go in the future? Fears, hopes, hopes for specific outcomes.
You might remind yourself anything can happen. Any day, any time, and welcome the uncertainty. Smile at this and breathe into it. Loosening up our trying to control the future.
You might lean back. Lean back physically into your chair, or relax even more supported by the ground. Drop your shoulders. Let your body feel supported and gently direct your mind toward the ease in your body, letting your muscles soften even more.
You might deepen and savor the feeling of certainty of this exact moment. Right now, you are safe.
And lastly, there are some lines you might say to yourself to further accept the feeling of uncertainty and to allow yourself to be here in your body right now.
You can repeat. One of these lines as you let go and release, soften.
Things are exactly as they are right now. There are unknown possibilities. In the future, this is the curriculum of life. I don't control the universe.
These brief moments of embodied awareness can help calm and reset your mind and your body, and it's been a pleasure to be with you. I'm wishing you many micro practices and ease. Thank you.
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